We write story now.

Of the people, by the people, for the people, for whatevs.
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Llama LluxaLlot
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We write story now.

Post by Llama LluxaLlot » Mon Aug 15, 2016 4:40 am

There are no rules. write as much or as little as you like. Plagiarizing is not only allowed, but suggested. I mean...how well can YOU actually write?

Ready? Here we go.

The camel died quite suddenly on the second day, and Selena fretted sulkily and, buffing her already impeccable nails – not for the first time since the journey began –pondered snidely if this would dissolve into a vignette of minor inconveniences like all the other holidays spent with Basil.

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n00less cluebie
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Re: We write story now.

Post by n00less cluebie » Mon Aug 15, 2016 6:35 pm

The hot desert sand did not mix with her anti-wrinkle facial cream, but at least the lack of humidity kept her hair from frizzing. In any case, she had been warned of the cosmetic disaster that was South Sudan, but what she HAD MOST DEFINITELY NOT been informed of, was the utter disgrace that was cell-coverage in the Sahara. It was like they had never even HEARD of 4G LTE out here, and she could not live-stream to her adoring fans at any less-than-civilized upload speed!

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sasquatch
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Re: We write story now.

Post by sasquatch » Mon Aug 15, 2016 10:51 pm

She remembers how she put the green leaf patterned case on her iPhone 6 while they were still on the sales floor. The sales assistant showed her how to change Siri's voice to male and add an English accent. "Basil" hasn't left her side since that first day they met. His keen interest in weather, love for geography and masterful trivia skills never fail to impress her. And he always knows the the best spot for a nearby half-caf, soy latte. She squints at the screen and reads it out loud "43% battery remaining."

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plane crazy
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Re: We write story now.

Post by plane crazy » Tue Aug 16, 2016 6:42 pm

“Caspian! Fetch my solar charger, will you dear?” She spoke rapidly so as to not lose a vowel. “I hate camels”, she spat, as her left foot kicked the useless animal. “Give me a :llama anytime, any day over a camel”, she exclaimed with a trill in her lovely voice. All the while, the planes circled overhead without a sound.

Llama LluxaLlot
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Re: We write story now.

Post by Llama LluxaLlot » Thu Aug 18, 2016 3:40 pm

Had Selena allowed her gaze to drift upwards, for a moment, at the silently circling planes, she would have, perhaps (or perhaps not) noticed that they were not COMPLETELY silent, nor were they truly circling, but moving in tight ellipses. Basil had seated himself on the off-gassing beast, while mopping his brow with a checkered 'kerchief. Or he would have been, had Basil been human. As it were, all he could manage was a soft squelching sound as he rocked back and forth in the damp fur of the now leaking camel hump.

"I say," he said.

"Yes," agreed Selena in a haughty tone, "That camel is totes the most gross. Call the 4 seasons Khartoum and tell them to upgrade us to a Llama. Several, I should think."

"I say," said Basil once again, this time pointing his virtual compass needle to the Sudanese People's Liberation Army which had appeared on the Horizon.

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n00less cluebie
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Re: We write story now.

Post by n00less cluebie » Fri Aug 19, 2016 12:58 am

Selena rolled her eyes. While she enjoyed Basil's sexy British accent, she never appreciated the fact that he said "i say" so often without following this up by saying anything. Perhaps she would switch back to William if she could convince the insipid device that her name wasn't "Sheila." It was at this point that she lifted her eyes to see the incoming army, and mistaking them for Four Seasons staff, imperiously demanded that they deliver her llamas post haste!

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sasquatch
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Re: We write story now.

Post by sasquatch » Sun Aug 21, 2016 9:46 am

"Kill Shot!" Dexter gestures shooting at the screen with his finger and reaches for another piece of Laffy Taffy. Selena's head fills the frame and there are green crosshairs lazily drifting across her cheek.

In the simulator, the average cloud puncher can hit their target 1 out of 3 times on the first pass. Dexter is not your average drone pilot. He has an 84.2 % kill rate on first pass in the real world and his attack angle is so low that authorities often attribute it to ground fire. But this isn't a kill mission. This is surveillance. Profitable surveillance.

The fat man pays him more in a few weeks than he used to make in a year under his government contract and he works from home now. It is a fat deal! And why shouldn't it be? He is the best. And everything about the fat man is fat... fat deals, fat wallet, fat body, fat head, fat cars, fat girlfriends, fat security guards, even his name is fat.

Dexter methodically masticates taffy and zooms out to see the approaching army. "Uh oh, boss is going to want to know about this." He reaches for his phone and sends a text to B. PHATT in his contacts. His taffy coated fingers stick to the screen as he types.

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Symbiosis
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Re: We write story now.

Post by Symbiosis » Sun Aug 21, 2016 11:07 pm

Standing at the head of the army, meanwhile, was Horus. This was a name which he presumed to give himself to replace his birth name, which he had found beautiful until he left his village for the city at the age of 12, and learned the hard way that in English it was a vulgar and profane set of words for which he didn't care to give an explanation every time he introduced himself.

Horus lowered his binoculars and raised his eyes to look at the drones. He felt fortunate that they had not deviated from their oval holding patterns. Not having anticipated their presence, Horus had driven his personnel right underneath their cursed wings; walked men who had entrusted him with their safety straight into the devil's jaws. But no fire rained from the sky, no bombs separated his soldiers from their limbs and emptied their blood into the thirsty sand. No, despite Horus' blunder, they would be safe.

But what, he wondered, were the drones here for if not to drop bombs? And who, he thought in passing, is the beautiful young woman sitting on a dead camel and looking at her phone as she talked into it as if it were another person standing there?

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imapickle
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Re: We write story now.

Post by imapickle » Mon Aug 22, 2016 10:03 am

And then I woke up.

The End.

:llama

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imapickle
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Re: We write story now.

Post by imapickle » Mon Aug 22, 2016 12:29 pm

Alternative continuation for those who are not purists of the dream ending:

The Sudanese Peoples Liberation Army Troopers, known affectionately as SPLATs to their enemies, were amongst the most ill-disciplined and gamblin´est men around. Once, during the famous seven minute war, a whole battalion had been found playing marbles in the middle of no mans land by their commanding officer. But not today. Today they were all galvanised by one overriding considerastion. One thought occupied their minds. They moved as one, thought as one, hoped as one, dreamed as one, but still took a dump individully for reasons of hygeine.

Today would be their independence day...

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n00less cluebie
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Re: We write story now.

Post by n00less cluebie » Mon Aug 22, 2016 4:35 pm

Well....not LITERALLY their Independence Day, but more of their Independence Day: Resurgence, in that when the proximity alarms and security cameras noted the incursion of Selena into their territory, the combination of poor video feed, the fact that few of them had actually SEEN the film, and in at least few cases knew exactly what a film WAS, caused them to confuse her with that film's co-star Maika Monroe. (This still didn't explain why Ahmed was still calling out "Will Smith!", but you know what they say: 'West Malakal, born and raised....'

In any case, the troops chanting of: "Maika! Maika!" (and again Ahmed's mistaken chant of "Fresh Prince!") was interpreted by Selena as some foreign request for autographs, but she was having NONE OF IT, at least until she received her llamas....

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sasquatch
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Re: We write story now.

Post by sasquatch » Wed Aug 31, 2016 4:18 pm

Basil chirps, "I say!"

:D

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Naraku
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Re: We write story now.

Post by Naraku » Wed Sep 07, 2016 1:49 pm

& the Sabertooth tigers said "Meow meow meow meow meow!!!!"

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