Sillysoft Forums

[mazza]

howdy guys

i havent been much on the tracker lately, but still have followed the forums with my usual interest, just with not as many comments as i usually make......Mazza's past 2 months have not been that good.....my pet Jack russell, Homer, is fighting a tumor on his back, and my 92 yr old Grandfather is currently in hospital, fighting pancreatic cancer, as well as a number of other things that seem to go wrong to 92 yr old people. The doctors do not think he will last the week, so.......well, i am sure each and every one of you know how hard it is losing loved ones, so i will not bore you with the finer details of my tortured soul atm.

due to all of this, and other factors goin on in my life, i told Dustin about 2-3 weeks ago that i am no longer capable of continuing in my role as a moderator. The past 2-3 yrs in the job have been very difficult at times, very fulfilling, challenging, yet a very proud time for myself, having been chosen as one of the "trusted" members of our little society. Getting hall of fame was very cool, but you can get into this by being a complete asshole anyway, whilst being asked to look over all of you scoundrals actually means that certain people in high places either recognise something in you, or respect/trust you enough to watch over one of their business ventures, well, THAT is something to be proud of.

im gonna post you the pm i sent dustin, only because i think some of the things i mentioned in it actually will blend in with Marauders recent thread about if lux is dead;

From: mazza
To: dustin
Posted: Wed May 30, 2012 2:47 am
Subject: Re: my time

i will always be stopping in, for games and to frequent the forums, do not worry bout that....i discovered lux and found it not only to be a game, it is more of a lifestyle, it has more to it than just killing....there is a great society within lux, a true microcosm of life.......you have it all here; all walks of life, gay men, nyphoes, religious peeps, atheists, blue-collar workers, white collar ones, rough peeps, classy peeps, lux has everything that life does, with many lessons to teach, to learn, to share....it is not only about winning, conquering.....it is about bettering yourself as an individual, competing strongly and fiercly, yet learning to lose with grace and dignity......People come and go from this game, yet i wonder how many truly learn the lessons that lux can give to you, life lessons in socialising with all walks of life, competing again the best, and the not-so good, losing and feeling like you can never win again, havin a winning streak where you almost feel like you do not know how to lose, bullet-proof, yet so vulnerable at the same time. I feel like i am one of the lucky ones coz i did learn a lot bout others, learnt so much bout places that i will never go coz the World is so big, met people whom i truly consider to be friends, even though i may never have the privelage of meeting them face to face, maybe never even being fortunate enough to hear the sound of their voices....this is truly the most humbling experience i think i could ever experience, and it took me to play lux to discover this Dustin, so i thank you personally for making this happen. you would prolly have not envisionged it yourself when creating the game, but, whether by luck or not, you should be truly commended for this, and i thank you for this. You never know what may happen in the future dustin....i know that leaving this little group is quite a final thing, but i decision that i feel i must make, with the circumstances explained to you already that are occuring at the moment in my World, yet i will be around in some capacity, i mean, i truly love some of you very much and could not really imagine not being able to pop in and have a chat....so you never know Dustin, one day in the future i may drop you a line askin you when i get my privs back, heh, i am prolly crazy enough in the brain to do it to you, and if you don't believe me......heh, ask around, others will tell you differently...... Peace, Andrew

---

Mara, lux is not dead whilst there are peeps like you questioning whether it is or not, and with peeps like me, who have taken so many life-long lessons back home to me from all of you. It aint dead when there are peeps like Drifter, who is the big-brother to me that i never had, the guy who made me want to join a community such as this. Lux is not dead when there is TSK and Jester, wasting countless hours with their forum games......lux is not dead when para is wasting the best yrs of his life, with toothpicks holding his eyes open, so that he can finish his newest.....whatever the fuck they r called, data-facts? graph analysis? probabilities.......ranking pages etc. It aint dead when there can be a group of people who are actually so proud to call themselves clowns, that they actaully play like em, and act like em??

Remeber 1 thing.......Dustin did not create this community. We all did. He only gave us the "meeting spot" where all of us could come and learn from each other, banter with each other, create the games we love, to compete with each other in the games we all love to play....the ones where it is so impossible in the real world to get 5 others to sit with you for 8 hours so u can actually play this game, the pub where we hang out, the tournies which all you created...i mean, sure, lux may be a little "dormant" at the moment, but, hey, many things that do sleep for alittle while actually do wake once again. Frankly, it is up to all of us.....the ones who care, to change this place again for the better...as dustin only created the game, but not the community, it really is up to us to create the environment in which peeps want to come and join us and play too. Maybe everyone who actually cares should write a little mission statement, even if it is only 1 line long. 1 way to improve lux from everyone who cared will be a lot better than no ideas from anyone, whether it be to help new players instead of yelling, being proactive in encouraging them to join the forums, or forum games, instead of callin peeps dicks for half-killing, be a little more relaxed about it, after all, it is only a GAME

[The Silken Knot]

Good luck to you, Mazza, and thanks for... you know... everything you've done for Lux ... but I'm sure we'll still see you around in the wee hours (of my day, anyway, lol). I truly hope that life eases upon the curve balls for a while.



And as usual, your post gave me food for thought. It reminds me once again that we often don't know what the person on the other side of the dice might be going through outside of Lux, unless they perhaps feel comfortable enough to mention it in chat. (When that happens, I've seen some of the most unexpected people turn out to be supportive and compassionate, which, of course, feeds back into my Candide complex about the community. Yikes.)

Even the most devoted Luxer has a life outside this place. But if they find some relaxation or respite or an outlet for their competitive nature or whatever through Lux or the forums... if they enjoy it and we enjoy it... who's to say that it's wasted time after all? I believe we're here to help each other when we can... even if that sometimes means killing each other again and again and again across a Lux map (or two, or 900).

Peace, dear.

[Darth Rellek]

MAZZA!!! My BANE brother muhahahahahaa

Hate to see you go, and you could never be 'replaced'
Im sure this community will not be the same without you around, and you will be highly missed, although there should be plenty of beer in the mod lounge now. HA HA!

[General K]

[paranoiarodeo]

It was my pleasure serving with you, Mazza.

(Godspeed to you and yours.)

[Capicola]

Bye, mazza. I love you.

[n00less cluebie]

mazza, your drunken antics will be missed, as will your positive energy and entertaining personality. I hope you will continue to hang around whenever time permits, and know that my prayers go with you and yours.

[hoodie]

I shouldn't be posting, I have only a couple hours left before leaving town for a month of travels. But this is one of the few posts that could make me set everything else aside and re-engage.

Mazza, you've always been one of the people that gave me faith in this community. There are some people that I point to in my mind and say... things are going to be good. Because of people like Mazza. Thank you for everything you've put in, you've earned an infinite supply of Banana Daquiris in the Mod Retirement Home. And best of luck with everything facing you in real life. You have all of our support and love.

And what you've said about the community as a whole is brilliant.

One thing that we forget is that Lux will always change. Lux will be dead when no one responds to a Lux is dead post. Lux will never be what it was that slice of time where we fell in love with it, with the community. At some point, all of the people you looked up to and learned the ropes with will walk on to something else, maybe they'll visit, but it won't be the same.

And that doesn't mean it's dead, it means its ripe for someone else to have their turn.

The lux is dead stuff reminds me a little bit of Burning Man was better years ago, or my country used to be great but now other people have ruined it... nothing in life is ever going to be the same as the snapshot in our mind of its perfect state. And if we're ok with that, we make new snapshots and enjoy it for what it is, and improve it as we can.

There were some lux is dead posts a few years ago (there always have been lux is dead posts) some certainly before you ever played your first game. I'm glad people didn't believe those posts, I'm glad those posts were wrong. Because that would have cheated you from a beautiful experience in life.

And something tells me, someone like you is about to stumble in, and fall in love with the game and the community for what they see. And they'll spend a few years putting in effort and emotion, working on friendships and rivalries, and they'll hopefully have the effect that you've had on the community and let the community have an effect on them. Its a beautiful thing to recognize, its a beautiful thing to come back and see.

Best of luck to you, and thank you.
Hoodie

[Schroberts]

Mazza, you're always one of my favorite peeps to see on the tracker. Your presence has been missed lately, and my heart goes out to you and your family right now. I love what you said about our strange lil online community. I know that lux has definitely served as a welcome escape/distraction at times in my life over the past few years, as I'm sure it has for many of us.

Best wishes on the outside, I'm sure we'll see ya around!

Ω!

[jesterme]

Good Luck Mazza, Sir.

We will still be here "wasting away" when you get back!

[3DA]

[gfips]

Hi Mazza,

I am sad to read the bad news, but things happen in life in we have to take whatever comes. So we all should enjoy the positive aspects of life. I wish you all the best to come over this soon. Take a timeout whenever you need it.

You know, you always were one of my favorite mods. You never put yourself in the foreground and you had always an open ear for everybody. But what i liked most: You always pointet out the positive side of lux and did not just critize everything in principle (as so many other people do in the forums - we all forget to often all the positive things about lux, which IS a great game! - ok i am turning away, back to you mazza ...).

So i am sad to loose you as great moderator and as great and positive member of the lux family. But i also hope you still keep in contact and play some games with us. I always enjoyed playing against you as one of the best players over all maps (my bloody Football Coach, Luxtoberfest 8 MVP! Lux Grand Slam Winner!, "Hall-Of-Famer", ...). You always play hard, but fair and with the aim to win (and thats why it is always a pleasure to play against you, even if i loose 15 games in a row against you).


I know, noone can really help you in your actual situation. Keep staying in the Lux Community and keep playing the game! If not return whenever you have the feeling and the time. Till then we will definitly miss you! THANK YOU FOR ALL THE TIME AND THE EFFORTS YOU PUT IN THIS GAME!

[Llux Llama]

Your post was beautiful and heartfelt. Another example of why people get hooked here....in all the bullshit you get some prime human experiences (even for a llama).

Take care of yourself and your family. My deep condolences for your greif in the face of loved one being ill. I will be happy to see you when you show up!

peace, Mazza.

-Llama

[Stelee]

Mazza,

Blessings to you and your family.

[Marauder]

[PJB]

Thank you for all the good work and time you invested in us.

Take care Skipper see you around.

[Mumps]

Take care Aussie brother, best of wishes with wherever life takes you

Peace

[Milltycoon]

Good luck with everything, Mazza.

[Drifter]

Maz... you made a wonderful description of our lil community, so very true.

I'm not sure I can add to what everyone else has said, or to what you and I have discussed. But you always know where you can find me.

∞ Drifter wipes the tears from his eye as he hugs his lil brother ∞

[Lantern]

Oh Mazza,

It has been a pleasure and an honor to share modhood with you. We had quite a time messing around in the mod lounge (and no matter what, we could not get you to put your pants on, just that blasted gold g-string)

You know how I feel about you so no need to go into it here but you are like a brother and I know we will keep in touch.

Friends can be made here in Luxtopia and I found one in you.

[Mushy Peas]

He's alright for a toffee.

[Enokrad]

Hey Maz,

I know you won't go MIA and that you will keep coming back when you find the chance to do so.
Even so, i wish you the best over there in the land down under

/me hands maz a frozen beer!

Best of luck buddy.

[WhirlPlaid]

Yo Mazza,

So sorry to hear about the rough patch you have encountered. Life throws stuff at us in unpredictable times and doesn't always give us easy solutions but I am sure you will over come.

I for one am truly grateful for the time you have dedicated to Lux and our goofy little community. Your humor, candor, demeanor, and all around approach to the game and position as mod are both admirable and inspiring. Like you said, we have made friends here from all walks of life, and I am happy to call you friend.

Good luck bro,
WP

P.S. Can you bring back you sun, Mazza, smiley face avatar, I love that one the most.

[mazza]

Thanks each and every one of you for your kind words and wishes.....some of your posts genuinely bought a little bit of "misty stuff" to my eyeballs (still wondering what stuff that is).......heh, but do not fear, my antics and loud mouth will not been gone forever.......

PS, Whirly, you know what is so effin strange.....once i changed that avatar, i have tried a few times to put it back, but it is telling me that the file is 23K and cannot be any bigger than 16. I wonder how i was able to have it in the 1st place........

If anyone knows how to compress it or whatever i have to do, lemme know.....i liked that one better too!!!

[Packman]

[Drifter]

Packers, stop that... mazza will be trying to lick his eye now.

[GYPCOUNT]

Luv ya bro...
Gyp